we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
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