I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms