is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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