How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
