party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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