I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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