dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I just forgot I was standing up.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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