so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
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I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
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Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
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