It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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