Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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