Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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