Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize