i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.