come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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