i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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