youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Ladies don't puke and tell
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize