We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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