Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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