Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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