Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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