butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
