can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
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