I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
