Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
