dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
