Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
