This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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