What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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