READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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