I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
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