so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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