Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Randomize
