Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
