If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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