So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize