well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
