I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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