you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
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I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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