one two three fourrrrnication!
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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