Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
