Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
