he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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