Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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