The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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