we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
