I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
