i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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