Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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