just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
