My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
