btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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