Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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